Four Signs When It's Time to Quit This may very well be the most unpopular essay in this issue. It might inspire you to madness but honestly, it comes from my heart and my own experience of learning when its time to quit an idea that has taken me hostage. My hope is that if you're stuck in a ditch, these four reasons will help you find a way out and onto success. My first attempt to write a book – it was about a recovering alcoholic who could see ghosts – failed, and failed bitterly I might add. I was working as the assistant to the VP of Public Relations at USC, at the time, and even though I was doing everything right - writing during my lunch hour and every night and on the weekends, and faithfully attending fiction writing workshops, etc. – I could not progress beyond the first three chapters. After two years – in this situation, perseverance was a highly overrated virtue – I finally had to quit that book. It was hard. I called myself a failure and I foresaw a life without achieving my childhood dream of becoming an author. But quitting that book was the smartest thing I did and that's why I carefully created the following four reasons why you may need to make that incredibly hard and yet, essential choice. As you read them, they might make you very uncomfortable. But that's good because when you're in an uncomfortable position, you have to shift or move; when you have an itch, you have to scratch it or stop wearing wool sweaters. When I had to put that first book away, in spite of all the hard work and dedication I had invested in it, I was forced to take a good long look at myself. I'd like to say that the next book I wrote was a resounding success. It wasn't. But it was the first book that I finished from page one to the end and that gave me the confidence to write a third, Hot Tamara, which was published by HarperCollins Avon in 2005. So here we go: I'm writing a sure thing that isn't so sure anymore. Becoming an author was something I wanted so badly. Like the Tim McGraw song, "How Bad Do You Want It", I could feel it, taste it and hear it knocking on my door every second of every day. But after writing two books with very strong, commercially viable ideas, I had to turn from the seemingly well-maintained, paved path of romance and jump into a gaping pit. At face value, Hot Tamara was not a "high concept" idea, nor did it fall neatly into the romance genre. It wasn't straight chick lit and there were very few women's fiction novels with Mexican American heroines (and those that did have ethnic heroines tended to be very deep and heavy and almost always ended in tragedy.). Simply put, at the time, there were no books like mine. But did I heed my doubts? Nope, because I had to write Hot Tamara. Some days the pages flew, but mostly they had to be turned in the womb or pushed out breech. Sometimes you have to take the road less traveled and go with a story that doesn't fit neatly into any category. For me, it paid off and even if Tamara hadn't been published, I would've had a book of which I was very proud. Brilliant idea but you killed it. Yes, it happens. You come up with the idea to beat all ideas, the one that will become a best selling blockbuster and in time, an Oscar winner. Now all you have to do is write it. Years later, but with only the first three chapters to show for all of your work, it might be time to let that idea go! When we let in our own critical voice, it's tough enough to finish a book. When we let everyone else's critical voices – critique groups, contest judges, favorite authors and your mama – we can kill our ideas. But don't freak out. The new ideas are out there. The next one may not be a golden egg. But it may be the one that makes your heart pound as you write it and sometimes raw passion can push you to finish a book. And a finished book brimming with passion is ultimately what the right agent and editor are looking for. Writing this book is making you physically ill. It's like going to a job that you hate, but if you're not writing under contract, why would you write for free? Writing shouldn't be that way. Yes, it's hard and the pay is crap but even on the tough days, there is nothing else I would rather do than write. Perhaps you've chosen a story that's very depressing but your voice and style are lighter and comedic in tone. Or, you have too many writers at your desk what with all the critique groups and contest judges whose opinions you have solicited. Or, someone told you that vampire nun stories are all the rage and you should write one so you can sell and get your foot in the door. If there is no joy in those first few chapters you've managed to complete, then its likely there won't be any found when you make it to the final chapter. You're too focused on the story. I learned this when I started writing a book titled, Loose Ends. It was about two sisters who never knew the other existed until their father was on his death bed. I finished a working draft but when I contemplated the revision, I envisioned consuming vast amounts of alcoholic beverages to get me through it. Putting it aside, I came up with the idea for my fifth book and then one night, I realized that Loose Ends wasn't a drama or a full-length novel. It was a novella about two sisters who, at their brother's high society wedding, compete to get the hottie at the bar upstairs and out of his pants. That story became "Till Death Do Us Part" in Names I Call My Sister. The moral of that story is that you may have chosen the wrong box to pack your idea into. You might be so focused on making it one thing that if you pull back and blur the lines, you might see that its meant to be something else. When you make the decision to quit an idea and forever leave it under your bed, go easy on yourself. First, you're not the only one. Second, quitting one idea doesn't mean that you'll quit all the other ideas that come to you (because you will have learned something in this process). Third, give yourself the time and space to just be. Retreating is a good thing as long as you do it to find and reignite the love of stories that inspired you to become a writer in the first place. Mary Castillo is the author of Switchcraft, In Between Men and Hot Tamara. She has also contributed novellas to the anthologies, Names I Call My Sister & Friday Night Chicas and writes for magazines. She lives in Orange County, CA with her family.